Another Panic Attack
I’m having a panic attack, help.
My chest heaves, and I can’t quite breathe.
Help, please, I plead.
Silently I wait for my negative thoughts to disappear.
Their swirling, picking up pace.
All I can do is hold my phone close.
Please, please, answer your texts.
I know you’ve seen, so, please.
I’m having a panic attack, help.
I press send once again.
My thoughts have whirled into their own storm,
I don't want them to see.
Body shielded by a blanket,
Sobs muffled by a trembling fist.
Chaos and doubts broke down my inner peace.
I’m having a panic attack, help.
Every sudden noise sends my heart racing.
My parents are fighting,
I might never see my mom again,
It was all because of me.
I am tempted to send the text.
Knowledge of her own problems stop me,
Clicking delete as my thoughts reach their darkest point.
I’m having a panic attack, help.
I shut off the phone and clench my eyes shut.
They were right, no one cared.
If I were to simply disappear,
No one would shed a tear.
I am alone and no one cares.
Not my best friend,
Not my brother,
Not even my mother.
When the trembling stops, and tears dry,
I give a content sigh.
I survived.