I didn’t start thinking until I was grown. 

When you’re young you live in a world without a phone.
And you don’t realize how difficult things are outside of your own little bubble

because sneaking the dog your vegetables is the only known way of trouble. 

But yes I grew up and yes I screwed up

And yes I’m only one girl when it all comes down to it. 

Nonetheless I’ve made a list of things I wish 

and now I’ll go through it:

 

I wish pigment wasn’t a problem and culture wasn’t an issue 

and when I shed tears the shame escaped into the tissue 

cause it’s not just race keeping us individuals apart 

like some of us refuse to see round shapes as art 

I didn’t learn about my body through Health Science class 

no, I learned from men rating my boobs and my ass 

Yet I’m only one voice who until now has kept quiet 

I’m sorry, was too busy swallowing pills for my diet

cause as a young woman I have to judge the number on the scale 

thinkin’ maybe I’d be thinner if like my friends my skin was pale.

As a kid life was simple I never knew about this stuff 

I had more than one shoulder to cry on when it all seemed too much 

Getting tougher with each bully and stronger with each praise 

a layer of protective confidence added around me with each phrase

One layer for “But you don’t look like your mom” 

And two for “he doesn’t take black girls to the prom” 

Three for “two fingers down the throat will do the trick” 

And four for “But there’s nothing wrong with being fat; some guys like thick” 

useless ugly stupid fat 

loser damaged slutty brat 

all these words only syllables but I can’t help that they echo /

inside of my brain until I just can’t let go 

and to these stains in my head 

there’s one thing to be said: 

Can you please please leave because

I’m just trying to breathe!

 

I grew up in this town while growing up on this planet  

I’ve heard the blame this country gets because a black man ran it 

I’ve touched the hands of broken souls yet to turn eighteen 

and I’ve watched heroes forget their wings for just more paper green. 

I’m not saying we’re corrupt I’m just worried for our future 

She used to be a lovely Earth until we all abused her. 

More oxygen is gone again forty football fields at a time 

women accepting men paid quarters 

while we are handed dimes 

Look, I’m sorry, okay? All I’ve done is complain 

but I fear nothing about our world will ever be the same  

They told me I should pray, once at night once at day 

and all I could do was look up to the sky and say:

There is no answer.

 

To cancer.

 

And our lives are dying.

I can’t help but wonder,

Are they even trying? 

It all feels so distant ’til it enters your being 

Visions of truth incapable of unseeing

But we are capable of fundamental change 

with every passing friendly open-minded exchange 

No more “kind of kindness” smile with everything you are

Because the kind of kindness you practice should be what gets you far

And not the money not the status not your placement on this earth

Not the family you fall into after the miracle of birth

So I propose we rise 

rise high above the cries  

Then soar above the lies 

and far beyond the skies

Look past what you see work towards what you dream 

and remember we’re to conquer the world on the same team 

Cause see 

Skin

Will win until we are all colorblind. 

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Don’t you wish equality didn’t feel so hard to find?