I’m not good with feelings

In fact I couldn’t tell you what I feel most of the time

What I can tell you is this

I am pessimistic and dark

 

I lost myself somewhere in that darkness

I made friends with my demons

The same demons that are constantly screaming inside of my head

The ones that scare me half to death

Because I am not fearless

In fact a lot of things absolutely shake me to my core

 

I am afraid because I know I can’t fight forever

My heart is being torn apart by the brutality of the world

The cruelty that humans show to other humans

My soul cries out for mercy as the darkness suffocates it

Inky tendrils that manage to dig their claws in so deep we can’t possibly dream of removing them

 

Broken people are tragically beautiful

They smile and go on acting like everything is fine

As long as they can get through one more day everything will be all right

 

It’s scary what a smile could hide

It’s heart wrenching to witness how the darkness warps those close to you

When they’ve become so damaged that when someone tries to give them what they deserve, they have no idea how to respond

 

However there will always be a light

Everything dark must have a counterbalance otherwise we wouldn’t be fighting so hard to live

You are all extraordinarily unique and effulgent

Never give up

Because your true friends will believe in you when nobody else does

They will be your rock, the shoulder you cry on, the ones to bring you back from the edge

Because you are always worth saving

After all, what defines us is how well we rise after falling

 

So when you feel that soul-crushing hopelessness

Remember that things always get better

There will always be people reaching for you hand

Take their outstretched hand and let them pull you back into the light

You are loved and cherished and wanted

That is what keeps me going

That gives me hope, making me believe that everything actually will turn out ok even if the world burns to the ground