The devil inside me

Location

Here I am standing in the dark, watching you, feeling you, seeing you…

I can’t believe what I’m seeing, hearing, feeling…
It’s like you can’t see me, oh wait you can’t...
I hate what I’m seeing; hearing, feeling, and watching you do…
Why can’t I just scream at you so you know I’m watching you!
Why can’t you realize you two aren’t the only ones here!
Even when I was here it was like I wasn’t because you didn’t pay attention to me.
You only care about yourself… Well now it’s her too…
Why do you have to be so cold… cold…? Cold…
Now all you do is talk about her! Why?
Am I nothing to you? Why did you pick HER?
Now I have someone else to worry about taking you away from me!
Why worry when you can just kill! KILL HER!
Just gets it over with! BANG!

Now she’s gone. DEAD. And you still only care about yourself!
All I ever wanted was for you to care about ME!
Is that too much to ask for?
All I want to know is WHY?
Do I have to jump out at you to even look at me?
All my life, and I’m still here trying to get your attention!
Why couldn’t I be like HER?
She’s everything you ever wanted right?
She’s everything you ever needed right?
Why not ME?

You’ve created this feeling inside me to kill…
This feeling is consuming my body.
And there is nothing I can do to stop it.
All I wanted was your attention
And if I can’t have it, then no one else can!
Why should I let you love someone else?
When you can’t even love your own daughter?
When you don’t even know I exist?
I’m tired of living like this! I hate feeling empty.

I will no longer feel empty.
Alone.
It’s time for me to feel free.
Alive.
So I’m going to let go.
Forget.
I’m going to live.
Love.
I hate being unloved for
The devil inside me.

Comments