I am a bad feminist
Location
“GO BACK TO THE KITCHEN”
I stand there with my cookies and my signup sheet
Surrounded with signs I spent all night making
‘gender equality matters’
It seems to whimper
I feel my neck turning a blotchy red on my pale skin
Like blood on flour
I feel tears flowing up uncontrollably like a gag reflex
I am too much of a girl screw my femininity I don’t want to celebrate it
I want to be a guy, I don’t want to battle this, and I don’t want to have to fight this
I’m not a good feminist, I want to have a penis
I don’t want to embrace my womanhood I just want to be equal goddamnitt
I don’t want to hear him say I was so ugly he wouldn’t even let me blow him
And still apply 3 different foundations and two types of mascara everyday
I don’t want another to say everything about my face is beautiful except my nose
And now I research nose job procedures once a week
I don’t want him to force his penis so far into my throat that I can’t breath
Just so I will still look up blowjob tips on YouTube for the next guy
I won’t hear that I was asking for it when I woke up and he was inside me
And I wasn’t even strong enough to report him
And what if I had another system of oppression on top of being a woman
I am middle class, well educated, and white
I have been given everything
I’m not strong enough for that
I can’t even handle a vagina
But I know that I am surrounded by resiliency
I don’t know a single girl who hasn’t been a victim of sexism
And I know every single one of them deserve more than what’s given to them
So they demand it
They give that glass ceiling an uppercut and with a handful of glittering glass
Cutting through their skin
They know they are worth it
And so am I.