My daddy built an empire with his tender, 18-year-old hands
as he kneaded the pizza dough for $5 an hour
for a future free of worries
communism was over, and freedom suddenly became
the softest slice of life
He breathed in the smell of flour -
white, wholesome, and heavenly, like the woman
who was waiting for him at home, thousands of miles away
In the nights he would lay in the baker’s attic,
surrounded not by her love but by tens of cockroaches
with nothing but a polaroid and a dream
190-hour weeks dragged by as he hit the pavement
with the same old white scruffy shoes he’d treasure many years to come
going from job to job - waiter, baker, and insurance salesman -
to build his empire
Nights were spent at the Roadhouse in a tight, red shirt with a notepad and pen,
“How are you guys doing tonight?” (Transylvanian accent included)
regulars would wait hours to be served by him,
the young, charismatic waiter from Romania whose story transfixed audiences
and whose charm could make any woman lick her lips in pursuit
as for the insurance part, well that’s not nearly as exciting
And when the day finally came for my mother and I to join him,
I met a man I had not yet known,
a man I’d spend the rest of my life hoping I could understand him
and hoping he could understand me - my daddy

My daddy built an empire at the age of 28
as we rode our bikes to the gas station to get my favorite treat
an orange creamsicle and Pepsi in hand,
we would walk to the tennis court, where I’d hit the ball too high and he would get frustrated
I was always scared he’d die, because he was my daddy and I was 7
and that’s just how little girls think
while I was at school, he was insurance-ing my mother’s college
and he would spend the nights at the Roadhouse, earning my piano lessons in tips
Friday nights and Sunday brunch was our main time together,
including the occasional drive to and from school
“Did you miss me?” he would say (Transylvanian accent included)
How can I not miss the man who sacrificed it all for me?
How can I not miss the man I strived to impress?
the Super Bowl became the highlight of his year, for he was proud to be an
American, American, American
Never offer the man a Miller Lite - he only drank Heineken
and screamed at each touchdown, cursing at each fumble
Every Wednesday we would drive 45 minutes out to the western vineyards
where there were gobs of grapes aplenty,
fat, juicy, and ripe with anticipation of freedom from the vines
I had never felt more free as the orange creamsicle wrapped itself around my face,
Guns n’ Roses playing in the background
'There’s a heaven above you baby'
arms outstretched as the rain dropped slowly
time stood still
'Don’t you cry tonight'

My daddy built an empire at the age of 38
as the police sirens raced to the scene,
untold stories of crime and life’s burdens reeked in our home,
only to be eradicated by the warmth from my 8-year-old sister,
pink and plump,
gayly running in and out of this sweet, southern home I fondly titled
“Arkansassy”
60-hour weeks defined the distribution of his time spent
gun in holster, laptop always open to a new report, ready
always ready
"You have the right to remain silent" (Transylvanian accent included)
Time carries the Burden of Change;
Change is unaware, forever encircling, engulfing
shutter speed;
Click!
Click!
Click!
he traded in his Roadhouse shirt for a slick 7d Mark II Canon
snapping shots of babies while they squirmed in their freshly ironed onesies,
surrounded by toys and blankets and all things soft
no longer did he carry the title of baker, waiter, or insurance salesman
the American Dream began peeping through 20 years later
he now bore the title of Deputy Sheriff,
goofy hat included; taser ready for action
“Photographer” on the side, he marveled in exposure and contrast,
blending away the lines of imperfection,
continuously carving out the road to my success
shutter speed; zoom
although Time carries the Burden of Change,
a photograph will always hold the moment,
crisply snapping each emotion
Click!
treasuring the youth of its Time
Click!
Burdening the soul with questions
Who? When? Where?
"I’ll still be thinking about you"