Junior year was supposed to be stressful.
The teachers said the work load would be difficult.
I heard the stories year after year.
But when it came last year,
I found out they were wrong.
The year wasn't stressful, I was prepared
The work load wasn't difficult, I was organized
I worked so hard.
I had so much ambition.
I was always planning
And staying driven.
But what I thought would be simple,
Soon turned around.
The loss wasn't within my education, but to myself.
I learned no matter how prepared,
How organized, how hard you worked,
How ambitious, or what you planned for,
Your not ready for life to be taken.
The loss of my grandmother,
Destroyed my dream of her handing me my diploma,
The loss of my uncle,
Destroyed my perception of stability,
The suicide attempt of my close friend,
Damaged my idea of the balance in my life,
And now the death of my friend to illness,
Damaged my sense of safety.
I'm broken, but not completely lost.
I may not have these people among me
But I learned that this pain was not for granted.
I am still driven.
They would want me to go on.
I have strength from these times.
Last year I built myself up,
Then was torn down,
Now I am recovering to be stronger.