Valentine's Day
Are you willing to wait for me?
I don’t know if it’s right to abuse you like this
This is my fault
Retching at pictures at everything you do the moment we kiss
Rejecting before attachment I’ve never not been talented
I still haven’t cried during a movie I’m sorry
Because Love is swallowing is a trap
Swinging in hammocks belonging to stranger’s front yards
Holding hands in trees and holding faces
I’d rather you vacuum the carpet with my body when I forget to clean
And call me every cursed name you can think of
Call me Ms. Liar
Call me Ms. Ugly
Call me Ms. Fag
Call me Ms. Tragedy
Just don’t call me Mrs.
I try to tell myself honesty doesn’t mean no privacy
Doesn’t mean I put tweezers under my undersheets and notebooks in dressers
I instinctively shove my phone under my bed covers before leaving the room
And sometimes there are candywrappers in my pillowcase
Like I’m back home in the morning before school
But it doesn’t mean silence I’ve tried that too
Are you willing to wait for me?
I don’t know if it’s right to let my abuser abuse you too