Afraid

I'm afraid of dying young

not of dying though

rather what would be said

I reckon the truth not so

 

I'm afraid some would say

that I lived a full life

one full of happiness

one absent of terrible strife

 

Im afraid some would say

that I hated this life

that i was hiding raw sadness

behind smiling teeth of white

 

I'm afraid it would be decided

whether I achieved anything memorable

whether I touched their hearts

whether I was ever really able

 

I'm afraid some would discover

the pain they never saw

feel guilty and pity

then blame me for it all

 

I'm afraid there will be excuses

for where the pain originated

I can promise you every reason

will have the finger pointed to me when stated

 

I'm afraid that this life that i live

will be completely misunderstood

completely twisted

completely sugarcoated good

 

I'm more afraid of those

who will glorify my life

then the fact that some

will learn more about my trials, in my afterlife

 

I'm afraid?

Yes, for sure

Who isn't?

There is no cure

 

I'm afraid because misunderstanding

is never understood

unless it is explained by the misunderstood

to achieve understanding

 

Afraid of a world

who will paint a life

far better than i experienced

and a goodbye that wouldn't draw the knife

 

Afraid of a world

Who will see me like all the others

broken and restless

youthful and undiscovered

 

Afraid that these words

will never be seen

or seen and dismissed

too dark for them to read

 

I'm not afraid of leaving this world

not afraid of dying

afraid that living in this world will kill me

and everything inside

 

Call me crazy

for caring more

of what will be said

then who i will make sore

 

Call me crazy

for being afraid

of words and interpretations

and not acknowledging what I've made

 

So go ahead, call me crazy

I dare you, please do it

let me speak my mind, please

while I can still defend and use it

 

Afraid? Not any more

for I have said everything here

I have communicated like you ask

and I have been mighty clear

 

These words might scare you

their power pure and harsh

yet screaming with truth

be careful, dont get scorched

 

You know what

I can't wait for what they say

and for what they feel

I portayed

 

Because it eases the mind knowing

your truth will never be unshined

never be denied

never be tried

 

So be afraid if you'd like

or relax and know

that the people who undoubtedbly love you

will never fall for the show

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