It will be hard and there will be doubt but you don’t give up.
You are weak to the words of the wise around you and second-guess yourself.
But, there will come a time when you are retching at two in the morning like any other morning,
And you will feel it.
Frozen in distress and surprise, you will feel it and you will place one hand on your belly, one and on the mirror and you will wait.
You know you felt it, didn’t you?
It has to have been real, you know you-!
You feel it, the nudge of a foot or a hand or an elbow, but you feel it.
The slightest of pressure and it becomes real, it all becomes real!
And you are so frightened but so overjoyed and you laugh at how ugly you look in the mirror crying like an idiot at two in the morning with vomit on your collar.
You are real, and so is the little baby you woke up from within, so you wipe your face and croon.
SHH SHH SHH it’s gonna be alright sweetheart, mommy’s here.
And more than anything you wish they could feel what you feel.
Because maybe they would understand and maybe they wouldn’t look at you the way they do in the hallways.
Maybe, maybe that doesn’t matter right now because you understand.
It is real and you are strong and life is beautiful.