blue lovers

I was looking for you
but I found you again, deep in blue
Smoking again I see..
It's funny because the other day
you were throwing up 
last night's liquor
and silly me,
was on my knees,
and there with you
As the cicadas sung the last sun-setting song

Why do I keep coming back?
When all the smoke you give
crawls up my back
and chokes me until i'm blue to.
Can you see my fragile thoughts
that I have displayed for you?
You were high
and the same song has been on repeat
for the past couple of weeks because of her
but what about me?

The last time you saw me cry
was before you took that vodka bottle 
near your eye
becuase you only thought of suicide
you grabbed in from the neck
and swung it around the room
you put on a show,
a show of blue
we tried to run away that night
but there is no where to escape

on one surreal blue evening
you turned to me and said
It's okay to be blue
I will only want to be blue with you, my dear
both of us were pulled under the sea currents
and found ourselfs under the blue
the grasp of your warm hand
made the blue sea into a large open grassland
and we discovered a new color that day.

This poem is about: 
Me

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