to the Boy with the Batman t-shirt

You sat there with a Batman t-shirt

and wandering eyes that never laid on mine

But I didn’t mind

Because you spoke when you had something to say

And I spoke too much

And that was okay because

every

word

you said

I can remember

And you probably don’t remember any of my

annoying jumble of nonsense, my

unfunny

painful, desperate

babbling,

trying to fill in the spaces and

my fidgeting

and my stupid attempt to try and

fit my lopsided jagged puzzle pieces

into a place where I clearly didn’t fit

or belong.

I was the corner piece being jammed

And smashed

into the middle of a riverfall

when I clearly was the trunk of tree

But you,

You made me less misplaced

and not so painful and desperate

and unfunny and fidgeting

and not just there

as a Shadow

but actually really there

as a Person

not forced

but eased in

as if I clearly belonged when I knew I didn’t.

You were the only thing about that day that I liked

or even remembered.

You were the only thing about that day that mattered

and it runs through my mind,

the things you said,

Constantly

Every stupid joke you cracked

And every new thing you taught me

And how amazed and confused I was

at how one person can say

So little

Yet say so much

And mean everything

to me.

And you don’t remember me but

That’s okay

That’s fine.

Because at least if I can’t be selfish

With you

I can at least keep your smile

And your words

And your eyes

that never really looked at mine

Locked away in my mind

Just for me

To revisit every day

until the memories are stretched thin

and fade to grey and someone else

comes along and makes me feel

just as good as you made me feel

that day.

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