Clearing My Mind

Are you staying true to the dream of the adolescent you?
Are you doing the things you always wanted to do? 
Are you able to shut off life around you and do silly things by yourself like you use to just because you wanted to?
The other day I was in the elevator with a kid no more than 4 years old 
He was singing and dancing in circles around his mother to a song that he probably made up in his head because the melody was nothing of one I’ve heard before 
I chuckle as I peek at his mother’s reaction 
She is smiling at him 
But her smile is more out of embarrassment that her son is uncontrollably expressing himself, in which I believe was his prosperity of living, through song and dance to the music of his imagination 
She looks back at me and her lips motions “Sorry” as she smirks in fear that I may have been judging 
Little did she know that I was jealous of her son 
I was looking at him thinking “When did I lose my childhood innocence?”
“When did I start feeling uncomfortable with myself to be afraid to sing and dance to my own mind?”
“When did I start to care about others judgmental thoughts of my self confidence”
I wanted to tell his mother that this 4 years old has inspired me 
And the unfortunate part is that he, just like the rest of us, will one day lose himself. 
I say this for the simple fact this woman wasn’t embracing her son’s joyfulness the way she should have. 
What hurt me a little is that he turns to her and smiles 
And because she felt that someone may have been judging her reaction to him she tries to ignore him
After countless tries his dance stopped 
Though he continued to sing 
His song wasn’t as strong 
My floor came and I walked off the elevator 
I could tell his was in broken spirit 
And only continued singing to see if he could find the same rhythm he was in before 
That moment I felt his mother beginning to build a bridge for him to cross over and leave this part of him behind 
All I could hope is that if he does cross that bridge, he would find his way back whenever he felt it to be necessary.

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