A Conversation with Doubt

Close the door, sweetheart.

What did you expect?

Don’t you know monsters

Only ever rest?

 

Basic observation would have saved you.

Why, there can never be two.

You knew, you knew.

 

But you threw yourself against the hourglass,

Understanding nothing.

And here we are,

Alone

Again.

 

           But I’m not alone this time.

           My sense has been redefined.

           I won’t accept I’m through again.

 

But what can you prove?

Where can you go?

What of this sense has found you a home?

 

I feel what you try to hide,

Covet the crafted lie.

Freedom’s not something you get to choose.

 

           I’m not alone this time.

           I couldn’t tell you why.

           I just need to believe that the only constant is change.

           I’m just the buffer here,

           A strain on my family, dear,

           And they drain me.

           They’re draining me.

 

           So I’m dropping the pretense.

But where will you go?

           I’m carving the distance.

There’s nowhere to go.

           I’ll keep on believing.

Nowhere but down.

           That I have finally, finally found a home.

 

           And if I’m alone this time,

           At least I’ll know I’ve tried - 

The senseless are the last to feel the cold.

Comments

Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741