An Even Trade

I traded my sorrows for a pretty face

And a bottle

I traded my sorrows for him

And a cigarette to my lips

My sorrows were replaced

With those things that they say

Kill slower than a speeding bullet

For a fleeting moment

I thought I could be happy

Because cancer kissed my lips

Because he held me so tight

Because liquor warmed my soul

I traded my sorrows

For drugs that are not found

In the definition of drugs

I traded my sorrows for late night hookups

I traded my sorrows for

Stories that were not my own

My sorrows were replaced

With a broken heart

With deteriorating lungs

With a misguided soul

What good have I done?

I thought you loved me

We were together for more than a year

Was it because I chose college?

Was it because I chose the army?

Or because I let my jealousy get the best of me

In the end

Tobacco and nicotine became my only friend

Frat parties and drinks became my favorite pastime

Thoughts of him were forgotten

An even trade

This poem is about: 
Me

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