Explanations

 

I…I can’t talk.
I wish for once someone could hear me.
It gets lonely down here in the dark, with
thoughts swirling around my head,
ready to take root in my actions
but never able to explain themselves.
 
Why? Why? Why did I drop out of this,
and why did I quit that?
Can't you see it was eating me alive? 
Can’t you see?
Of course you can’t. 
 
Why? Why? Why did I leave this place,
and why did I find a new home?
Can’t you see it was keeping me
from being all the things I
wanted to see in the mirror?
Of course you can’t.
 
Why? Why? Why did I stop loving you,
and why did run away?
Can’t you see I never did?
Can’t you see the longing, can’t you feel it?
Of course you can’t.
 
Because all you can do is hear,
and as I reminded you earlier 
I can’t talk (could you hear that?). 
You look for words rather than actions,
speech rather than emotion.
 
So I’ll write you a poem.
You can read these words, and maybe 
you’ll understand for once,
be content with the explanation for once.
But just know you’ll never hear
an apology;
that's for you to make.
 

 

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