Extra ordinary

When someone says to me "You're extra ordinary" I question do you even know me.

What makes me extra from the people around me ? Is it the way that I walk or my voice that's sounding ?

Is it my smile that'll light you up for miles? It's like sunshine that you yearn to seek in the darkness. Let's all go back to the start of this.

They say home is where the heart is so let's just say I grew up heartless. Never felt as if I was worthy of the words , I love you. See as a child when a mother sits you on her knee that's the only place you wish to be, but  my mother couldn't do that she couldn't seem to , her knees were bruised.

Bruised and used by the one she loved most, the one on that wedding day that stood next to her to recite those vows is now the same dude that's bruising her now.

She stayed with him because she wanted a father for me, thought that that would set me free of the name bastard . See that was the first disaster.

When I came he couldn't see his face in me. I wasnt anything he expected me to be, so therefore I wasn't his.

Bastard is the name I was given and so it stayed it played in the back of my mind, till it was carved in my eyelids and when I closed my eyes that was all that I saw.

Rocked me to sleep like a lullaby and woke me up in this world. The bastard baby became a bastard girl.

The girl that was taught that her skin wasn't beautiful. When the media tells you what the definition of beauty is,you tend to follow it to the T .

It was everything I wished and wanted to be. Long straight hair was what they wanted . Not my natural hair and naps, light skin was in and I was black.

Eyes as brown as toasted almonds not blue as the sea. Nubian princess but see I didn't see that I was destined to be a queen.

Told that no body would ever want me unless I assumed the identity of conformity.

Fists held by my sides defensive to the world instead of held high like my forebears before me to show my worth.

My black is beautiful it's my birthright and my worth. So when you say I'm extra ordinary , think about those words carefully.

I am extra ordinary , my struggle speaks words of me , my triumph against odds gives me victory , my worth is more than diamonds because under pressure I shine.

I am worth your time , my name is not bastard , I am worth the words I want to hear and when you say them to me make sure that they are loud and clear. 

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