It’s the end of Winter break, and I’m chilling at home,

And I’ll admit it’s been about 10 years since I’ve written a poem.

But sure, I’ll take a stab at it, why not give it a shot?

I must say, I’m just four lines in, but I’m already enjoying this a lot.

Today, I think I’ll talk about a certain undeniable topic,

Just a little bit about me, but I assure it’s no biopic.

So congrats in advance to those who can say they saw this,

‘Cause I’m letting you in on a secret – how I became this flawless.

 

(Clears throat)

I haven’t been to the gym in well over three months,

My stomach’s gone from washboard to rounder than tree trunks.

I’m so out of shape, it’s doubtful I could even run a mile,

But it’s fine, ‘cause I haven’t been this relaxed in a while.

It’s true, I’ve hardly began looking for a summer job,

God knows I need money, maybe there’s a bank to rob,

Relax, that was just a joke, please don’t call the police,

In fact, after I’m done writing this I’ll send in six job apps at least.

I haven’t left the house or even showered the past two days,

The resulting smell is beyond the repair of AXE body sprays.

But I don’t need to go out or where cologne to feel manly,

Besides I leave soon, so I’ll spend these last days with family.

I recently spilled water on my laptop, a repair that was 800 bucks,

I took one look at that receipt and thought “what terrible luck.”

My parents made sure I knew that I would be paying them back,

And you can bet your bottom dollar I learned my lesson from that.

 

The point is I’m far from perfect, I think I’ve made that much clear,

As clear as my Miami Heat lost the championship last year.

I know that I’ve had more than my share of mistakes made,

But I know that’s just life, so I let all my worries fade.

I tell others not to take life so seriously and to simply have fun,

Or else you’ll assuredly regret it when it’s all said and done

It’s important to live life day to day and week to week,

And my ability to see the good in the bad is what makes me unique.

The ability to live with optimism is the remedy to all tragedy,

And I believe each person in this world can benefit from this strategy.

So you see, there really is no secret to it at all,

Just be comfortable in your skin, and you’ll prepared when you fall.

For I know that focusing on the bad will give me no solace,

But it’s enduring despite my flaws that makes me truly flawless.