Forgive Me For My Ignorance
Best--what?
You never said it right out.
Maybe that wasn't what people were supposed to do.
It never occured to me.
I never figured
That you belonged to me.
I hadn't taken you--
You had just fallen, fallen, fallen into my arms.
How could you believe--
Knowing about all the continents, the lives
I'd left behind forever
How could you belive that you
Could choose me, and be safe?
Did you think that somehow, this time, I would stay?
I'm restless.
I always have to move on
After a while.
I didn't do it to hurt you.
But I feel like I've failed us.
I feel like I've ruined us on purpose.
I feel like I've killed the small life we shared between us.
Will you forgive me?
It isn't as if I had a choice.
It isn't as if I could have run away
From running away
From us.
I don't know how you work.
I can't, will never understand
But
Now that everything's past tense
I think I have some of your longing
Left in me.
I didn't know I meant so much.
I didn't know I could ever mean so much
To someone who had been all but a stranger
Two years ago.
I have so much to learn
About this life I run away from,
So many times.
Please.
It's all I can do to keep myself
From drowning in the tears
That don't exist
The tears on the inside
That by nature I have too many of.
Please.
Forgive me
For all that
I didn't know.
Forgive me for my ignorance.
Please.