Friendless

Everywhere I turn silence greets me

If there is one thing I yearn for it is a face

Something other than the embrace

Of solace, because her mockery is deafening

She cackles loudly in my mind

Reminding me that no one comes

But her to my side

Everyone else steps aside

When I am falling

Reaching

Crying

For someone to call out

And burn all the doubt

From my mind

To whisper I am not alone

And guide me back home

 

All I do day after day

Is soothe those in need

Of a comforting word

Or deed

Repeatedly I bring

Those who constantly

Hurt me back into my life

Because for the will of me I cannot

Turn down those in need of my service

It is one of my vices

A knife that slices

Pain into my heart

Painting scars across my skin like art

Stop, I need to but I won’t

I can’t

I don’t

I am an addict to pain

In vain I push those away

Then pathetically draw them back in

Telling myself not again

Will I allow them to treat me that way

But like routine

They deem me useless

When my services are no longer useful

By then I feel no need to be careful

About my feelings

So when I am dumped

Back on the street

I fall to the ground

Not able to stand on my feet

Since they were kicked from beneath me

This all happened so quickly

But wait I knew this was coming

So why am I still sitting shocked

With blood pouring from my heart

Like the tears I will never shed

They will stay within

                                                                            Until I am dead

Comments

RebeccaYSPerez

This poem was very open and raw, and there were some places where the chopping up of the sentence to make sure it fit the format you gave it was a little weird but it was definitely a beautiful, strong piece that allowed you to express everything that you needed to. I understand that there have been a lot of times where people have been using others, you, in this case, to help them, to be there for them, but then never be there for you when the time comes. This has been something I struggle with as well, but I want to give you some faith, if not in other people but in the way you are. By helping other people, no matter what they do for you or to you in return, you should always know that you did the right thing by helping, and being there for someone else. It is their karma what they do to you, what you did to them is your own. J. R. R. Tolkien said there is humanity in this world, and it is worth fighting for. I believe that is absolutely right, so don't give up or change who you are, the way you are, because of other people, know that you are doing the right thing and it is okay to be hurt by it but don't make that change who you are. Remember hurt people hurt people. Thank you for sharing this.

Rebecca

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