Who is to say I am going to Hell,
Without knowing my full story?
Without knowing how I will spend my life?
Without knowing all of me?
Where will I go for being true?
True to myself, and true to others.
Will I be damned to Hell for being true?
Or will I sail up to Heaven for living a lie?
Will I walk up that giant stairway to the golden gates of Heaven,
For being something I know I am not?
For changing who I am to please everyone else?
Or will I fall into an eternity of flames and misery for my feelings?
Desire for a happy life,
A life full of joy, affection, and acceptance.
Hatred for living a lie,
A lie that pleases everyone but myself.
So where do I go from here?
I only have one life.
Only one chance to go to Heaven,
Once chance to go to Hell.
But this right here,
This very moment is Hell.
Lying to everyone I love.
Being someone I know I am not meant to be.
Judgement day with the Lord.
But everyday in this Hell on Earth is Judgement day.
Judged for being different,
For being me.
So I guess I’ll sit back,
Watch the days go by,
As I wonder to myself,
Heaven or Hell?
Supposed sin or purity?
How will I know what to choose?
Will God send me a sign?
Or will he let my mind cave in,
As I crumble with loathing?
Loathing for myself,
This is my Hell on Earth.
I have nowhere to go but up.
These few moments,
This is my Hell.