Hellfire In the Rainbow

Here's something for you all.

My world is modern Technicolor;

vibrant, awe-inspiring, filled with wonder an special effects.

It is stunning.

It is my Xanadu

All I could dream for, and more.

Bright colors frolic,

careless and playful.

Sparkles dance joyously,

free

untethered.

For many and many a day

my world was black and white.

Grainy, distorted, fuzzy, lost.

And then, I met my chums,

my crutch, my love, my life.

They transformed,

remodeled my world,

granted me my every desire,

regardless of its innocence, or spitefulness.

I was complete, released, running wild

in this brilliant, newfound realm..

Yet there was fine print I failed to heed.

The colors became constricting

asphyxiating, noxious.

Swirling,

marauding in their reverie.

Spooks lunge from every crevice

arising in me woe.

I cannot cease to stumble in potholes

of myriad length and depth.

Every time emerging

with an expression of maniacal glee.

I am on top of my world,

exultant in my madness.

And then I fall

down

down

down

to the bowels of the blackest abyss..

While there, I sit and grovel

alone in agony

waiting for the chemical love to envelop me,

take me away..

Till once again, I ascend.

There is no family,

there are no friends,

no need for work or play.

As long as I have my manufactured bliss,

or rather, my Master,

nothing else matters.

I am nothing.

The machinations of my sanity

are essential to me, as is air.

Without them, I am a shell,

a soulless embodiment of desperation.

My killer loves killing me

while I love being killed

slowly, subtly.

I am speeding down the freeway

so lunatic..

opposite the flow of traffic.

There is no stopping,

no turning back

till I crash

or veer off course

in this sick, beautiful, Technicolor universe.

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