I sit. Everything is ok.
Then it starts.
My heart starts to pound.
My hands start to sweat.
I can feel my breath start to quicken.
Faster, and faster.
“Stop” I say to myself. “Everything will be ok.”
But that doesn’t work.
I can feel the fear, slowly rising up into my throat, grabbing hold of my shirt, and suffocating me.
I can feel the words being ripped from my dry tongue, as I am gasping for breath.
I pull at the collar of my shirt, trying to suck in all the air I can.
The images I see in front of me, blur into one mess of color and movement.
As my stomach feels like it’s about to come out of my mouth.
My screams of agony bring me no help, for nobody can see my inner turmoil.
They can’t hear the voices that are desperately trying to help me.
“Get out, Get out” my mind screams, but I try to bury those screams under happy thoughts.
I think about the happy moments in my life.
But the voices are persistent…