Step, breathe in, step, step, step, breathe out.
Don't forget to smile.
If it slips for even a moment, you suddenly transform into this perceived monster of unpleasant, dishonest and ungracious tendencies.
How dare you.
After everything they have done for you?!
After they have wasted their hard earned money on YOU?
After they took time out of THEIR day to attend to YOU?
After all that, you can't even hold a smile?
How dare you.
Step, breathe in, step, step, breathe out.
"You're not even trying" they say.
"You used to be such a good kid"
"What a waste"
You're supposed to forget the times that you choked back the only potential expression and release of emotion.
Youre supposed to forget all of the times you felt completely alone in a crowd.
You're supposed to forget all of the times you imagined having a voice in life.
Well, how dare you feel any other way?!
How dare you feel at all.
How dare I?
How about you?
How dare you ever make another human being feel as if they are nothing but an insignificant speck in this harsh reality that we call existence?
How dare you make me out to be less than I am?
How dare you silence the outcries of the otherwise muted majority!
So how dare I?
How dare I not!
If only I could.
These words pour out of me with the impassioned fury of all human triumph.
But I remain silent and ashamed.
Step, breathe in, step, breathe out...and smile.