I am a failure

I am a failure. I am a failure at being honest. I am a failure at being punctual. I am a failure for being jealous. I am a failure for being greedy. I am a failure at drinking too much. I am a failure for sleeping with too many people. I am a failure at knowing what I want most in life. I am a failure at keeping the ones I love happy. I am a failure for judging people before I know them. I am a failure at starting my own business. I am a failure as a student. I am a failure at being a lover. I am a failure at being a girlfriend. I am a failure at being a sister. I am a failure at being a daughter. I am a failure at being a friend. I am a failure at being a mentor. I am a failure for being a hypocrite. I am a failure as a songwriter. I am a a failure as a rape victim. I am failure because I am a slut. I am a failure because I like too many pills. I am failure because I am a liar. I am a failure because I doubt that I will accomplish anything ever. I am a failure because I think about killing myself. I am a failure at attempting suicide. I am a BIG FUCKING FAILURE. 

But I try to be better. 

I am going to be better for myself. I am going to be better for my future daughter so that when the day comes and she tells me "Mommy, I am a failure." "I am nothing." "I am worthless"

I will wipe those tears off of her cheeks and tell her,  

"No, you are not being defined by one word. Not yet. Not Now. Because as you are still breathing you can still try.

Again and again until the day you die you will try to be better. 

You are only a failure when you stop trying."

This poem is about: 
Me
My family
Our world

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