Have I smelled an onion; is there one nearby?

Is the air so cold that it is causing me to start releasing water bombs?

You have scarred my heart.

Your mark is forever imprinted on my soul,

Constantly causing me to feel pain in every joint and every muscle and every living tissue and fiber throughout my body during ever waking day I am alive and trying to live my life as if everything is just dandy and you have had no impact on my life whatsoever and you are nothing more to me than a mutual acquaintance.

I can’t do this anymore.

I can’t pretend that being here makes it easier to forget you because honestly it makes it harder to move on since I cannot be back home with my friends who have experienced it with me from the beginning.

To think that no one here has any idea what hell you put me through, what happiness you gave me, and what happiness you took away.

I want you to suffer for eternity for what you have made me; a monster in human skin.

A heartless monster with no sense of what is true and what is fake, what is real and what is intangible.

And you are the devil.

Robbing me of my sense of truth and reality.

Dictating the path of my life, my schedule, what I was and wasn’t supposed to feel.

I hate you.

But at the same time, I can’t help but be madly in love with you for helping my self-confidence and helping the happiness return to my eyes.

I am conflicted as to what I am supposed to do about the chances that were stolen from under my feet or about the happiness from your words that I miss immensely.

Is it so wrong to still want something that was so dysfunctional but at the same time so rewarding?

Stop being a contradiction; it won’t get you anywhere on your path.

It’ll only cause you to fall among the dust, among those of us who cannot move either forward or backwards on our paths of loneliness and broken hearts.