I never miss you anymore

Location

There are days when I look up at the moon and think of you.

I think of you but I never miss you anymore. 

Some days I feel alone at home and think of you but I don’t care about where you are or what you might be doing. Sometimes I’m dusting off your jacket to wear it but I don’t because I don’t want to smell like you because I never miss you anymore.

Most days I pace an empty room where your things used to be just to get that crawling feeling off my skin. It’s like your nails are still digging into my back and I hate you for it.

I have days when things suck and I can’t smile then I remember you’re gone and I feel relieved. Is that cruel? It might be but I never miss you anymore.

I have days where my hands tremble when I walk into the house but I shake it off. I have to shake it off because I can’t be broken by you. Not again, never again. You are my past, my regret. So stay buried in the desert where others can honor you because I never miss you anymore.

I am what remains of you because unlike others I never miss you anymore.

 

Comments

Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741