I USED TO LOVE

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I used to Love

Could everyone tell but me ?

The feelings I felt you never felt the same for me .

And what a shame ,

All we could have been .

Everything you said I believed in

so whole heartedly.

How could I not see past the façade

Of all the lies , the games && trickery.

They say that love is blind,

But I say love is blinding .

I couldn’t see what was right in front of me ,

With love in the way blocking me.

My heart I gave , no strings attached

That heart you took and tore apart.

Now I’m left alone to find and put back all the pieces,

Of a heart which was never quite whole to begin with.

So where do I go from here ?

I have yet to mend this heart of mine ,

Thinking of you still send shivers up my spine ,

I know you’ve moved on ,

And I wish I could to,

But believe me when I say it’s not that easy ;

Not that easy, as it was loving you .

And even if you did me wrong,

My love for you remains so strong .

I refuse to believe you never loved me .

I refuse to believe you and I will never be ,

More than just a fantasy ;

That I still wish could have been a reality .

I know I must let you go,

And that this is something I needed to go through in order to grow .

But tell me what do I do from here?

How do I get out of this web which has entangled me .

Can someone help me please ,

I can’t see with love-still in the way blocking me .

Every time I try to move forward ,

something pulls me  into the reverse direction .

I know I’m to blame for this constant obstruction.

I hung around you so long that lies now become a daily habit .

I keep lying to myself to stop the crying ,

Cuz I figure if I lie it will somehow numb the pain .

And what’s now a hole in my chest can start beating again.

I’ve come to realize that these lies

Do nothing but create more lonely cries .

Yet I do nothing in my power to try to stop it .

They say that all is fair in love and war

But because of you I closed that door

And I’m scared to look out anymore.

Because , After you my dear ,

Love just don’t live here no more.

"Memoirs of what used to be a Broken girl"

Comments

indigoblu97

first off, great job. Nice rhyme scheme and the continuous single stanza like a heartbroken sigh compliments the subject matter well. 

Secondly, as a girl who also had her heart broken by a guy who only lied ( see "the ocean and you" etc.) I definately get this feeling. People say move on, but you can't. It's a reality disconnect when all that you thought was real and beautiful and honest was just crap and lies. My advice is to not put much effort into "moving on" but into being you. You are not broken. Lies do not make the truth any more less because they are only fake. You are whole and strong. You can write with beauty, so become this beauty. Embrace the you he didn't and I think you'll find she's way better than he ever deserved. ;)

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