I Want to Change the Word “Depression”
Today,
Depression is synonymous with crazy.
My mother treats me like
A live bomb,
Ready to explode at any minute.
She tells me that I need the meds again
Because I’ve been “too irritable lately”.
Apparently when you’re recovering from depression
You’re not allowed to feel anything.
I want to change the way
People look at me
When I wear shorts in the summer.
I’m sorry that I am no longer ashamed
Of the light purple scars
That litter my thighs.
They’re a part of my past,
A reminder that I survived.
I can’t make them go away, anyways.
I want to change the way
I am treated like a fragile doll
By everyone around me.
I am stronger now.
I’m not going to break again.
Please don’t try to protect me.
I can protect myself.
I always could.
I want to change the way
That someone can look at their daughter
Or lover
Or best friend
And view them as irreparable
Because a man in a white coat
Says they’re depressed.
I do not have a terminal disease.
I can get better.
I want to change the mindset
That someone can wake up one morning
And decide to not be depressed.
I didn’t choose to feel this way.
I want to change the word “depression”
To "cancer of the mind"
Because maybe then I’ll be supported
To conquer a disease I did not ask for
Instead of being shunned
For having depression.