IDK _I Never Know

I finished my essay
It's a lot to say
Maybe the message was heard
It'll soar like a bird
A story undeterred
More like thoughts slurred
I may be a clown
But you can't make me frown
I may be weird
But I have no care to be feared
I'm ok with accepting it
With considerable wit
Everyone here saying its terrible
With me shrugging saying its bearable
Living with the happiness I seek
Never one to be meek
Watching as all of you stare
I wish to live without a care
Cruel words do hurt
In fact they assert
They sum up your hate
Insults that are much too late
I knew you were scared
But unlike others I cared
I cared enough to ignore your words
Looked beneath long enough to see the herds
Saw your locked away tears
My presence unlocking your fears
Maybe one day you'll see
You never meant to hurt me
You meant to hold back a thread
Only so you could socially get ahead
Now through the years
You've unleashed your tears
Looked back to those days
Hearing my I'm okays
You see the people that were there
And now all you can do is stare
You walk into the room
Ready to sweep with your broom
Sweep away the regret
Sweep away the debt
I owe it to you
My shiny life anew
If it were not for the years in school with your insults
My life would have had rather different results
If I hadn't struggled and fought
Happy with the thought of being taught
Determined to be better
Following the rules to the letter
Joyous with the choice of not being a quitter
Refusing to be bitter
The rush of wanting to get ahead
Thoughts of success in my head
Exhuberant at the thought of winning
My mind has my heart spinning
Working hard for what I want
Nevermore stopping to hear your famous taunt
I never would have got here
Without your constant sneer
You pushed me in the right direction
Striving for perfection
I wouldn't have tried
I probably would've just cried
If I wasn't so determined
In my mind my success already predetermined
I was always ridiculed
Now I'm happy to see your words overruled
You said I'd never make the cut
I nipped that in the butt
Said I was nothing
Proved I was something
I pushed past your words of hate
Struggled to elevate
Who are we now in this world?
Our hearts uncurled
Look at me now
You got to say wow
From being the loner in the back
To the first on the track
This story is my own
Take it with a respectful tone
Who we were then
Thinking about it as I lift my pen
Who we work to be
Keeping my focus so I can see
Greatness I hope to obtain
Not everything starts with pain
I'm graduating now
Taking a bow
I owe it all to you
My life anew
After all these years
So many careers
All those horrible words
Calmed the herds
I unlocked your fears
Saw those unshed tears
The day your eyes truly opened
The bully in you was pinned
You hurt me
So others would let you be
You walk into the room
Ready to sweep with your broom
I knew I'd see you soon
Walk out of your bully cocoon
You forced me to try
Made me cry
I got up and saw me
Saw all that I could be
You method was terrible
Hardly even bearable
You may not have actually tried to motivate
But some of it I appreciate
Your cruelty made me rethink everything
Look back on my life and see something
Made me realize I wasn't seeing
Merely getting by without actually being
A bully changed
A child's path rearranged
From bully to buddy
From perfect to cruddy
The world is the rain
You must refrain
You are the dirt
Able to be hurt
Life is the muddy road
Ready to be stepped in and you better be prepared to be towed
The next step will be light
But ever so bright
A note we send
A poem till the end

This poem is about: 
My community
Our world
Poetry Terms Demonstrated: