I still smell the blood -

From the wounds and the punctures 

of my need for your love

a desire that destroyed me. 

Feasted on every last bit of me, 

left my carcass for the vultures. 

i wish wanting you didnt feel like torture. 

Locked in this dungeon trying to choose between my life and your love. 

Maybe I thought your heart was stronger than this

But i can only wish you could 

handle a love so strong

Because your heart was only made 

to pump blood.

And your soul was just made to exist and not intertwine and combine and become one with mine. 

I wish i could travel into your heart and mind

To birth the idea of you and I

i wish i can redefine my name in your head

Put all the distractions to bed. 

I wish I could shoot you dead 

And bring you back to life 

So that you would 

have no choice but to abide

i wish I can call you mine. 

i  wish I could part your seas and see beneath the murky waters of your soul

I wish you were mine to hold

i wish i could be everything youd ever need. 

The water, food and the air youd breathe. 

I wish i could tell you the 

following face to face. 

I wish our hearts were in the same place

Because this desire makes me feel insane 

And theres always 

too much space between us. 

i wish shooting cupids arrow at you didnt feel like poaching

i wish fighting these feelings didnt feel like

Taking a whipping

i wish that through my prose and rhyme youd want to be mine 

and after all this time, youd want me to yourself and no one else.

I wish i was your redemption 

I wish you would understand 

the concept of devotion

I wish there was a 

such thing as a love potion 

Because we would both overdose

And you would finally hold me close

And never, ever let go. 

Maybe then you would find satisfaction

living in this crypt I call a heart

Because mine is big enough for both of us. 

We would never spend a second apart. 

maybe then,

the end could be the start.

 

But that would be a fairytale. 

And in this lifetime, its not mine. 

So i let go

Or Atleast i tried.           

Because ive died atleast five times in one night

I take flight in my dreams 

And still you haunt me there,

Despite my cries

Why cant you untie the ties 

Of your lies in your life

Then let the lies slip down the sides of your eyes.

Tears. 

Like the ones youve caused me, 

overflowing like high tide.

Surrender the disguise 

that implies youre my mine

Because i know 

what you desire is my demise

It became clear the night 

you ripped out my heart and left

But its time to swallow your pride. 

Let go of the lies that burn your ties

To those whose lives 

Youve hurt including mine

Youve made me tired

Countless nights i've cried 

Fuck your pride

Youre a monster.

One day youll realize what lies

Behind your eyes

In the darkness of your mind.