Love You

I’m sitting you down here today because we need to talk.

You know what? I take that back.

I need to talk. You need to listen.

Over the course of our relationship, you've already done enough of the talking.

 

And I just had to tell you this in person.

Because no text or phone call can thoroughly iterate what it is that I’m trying to say.

I want you to tune in to the very words that I deliver from my mouth.

Focus on the emphasis of emotions that I write across my face.

 

I’m finally settling down.

I’m finally realizing who I am and what I’m worth, and quite frankly, you and I, we just don’t work.

Sorry, I’m not sorry, for choosing I over you, because you dang sure weren’t sorry when the roles were reversed.

 

Where do I begin?

I should’ve stuck with my intuition when we first met, the word regret was written all across your face.

But I acted as though I possessed blind eyes and couldn’t see.

 

I kept on loving you.

I thought my heart could hone yours into the heart that I wanted it to be.

So, I let you in.

It seems in those times when I'd strip for you, I was revealing more than just my naked body, but my heart too.

I shared my darkest, most intimate sentiments with you.

I thought you’d feel sympathetic.

I’d lean out my head, only to discover that your shoulder was nowhere to be found.

I knew, early on that we were bound for failure.

But I just couldn’t leave you alone.

You filled a void in my heart.

You numbed the ache that my heart felt from past breaks.

 

I was hooked on you.

It was like I was strung out on methamphetamine, you numbed the pressure.

It was like I was addicted to pornography, you satisfied my desires.

It was like I was problem gambling, I kept failing, but I held on to the little hope that I had that said I'd eventually succeed.

 

Whenever I reminisce on that very day that I met you, the feelings of despair and dejection haunt me once again.

But oh now, how I I hear the soulful, tenor voice of Sam Cooke singing, “It’s been a long time coming, but I know a change is gonna come.”

This time around, I’m not taking time out to use my love to heal anyone else, but my own self.

I need me more than you and anyone else does.

 

I know that if I gave her as much love as I’ve given you, she will rise.

I know that if I put as much effort and energy into her, that I put into you, she will evolve.

 

Until I learn to love myself, those who don't will continuously draw nearer to me.

 

All along,

All I ever need to feel complete was me.

 

 

This poem is about: 
Me

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