Memory Pill

I envy those with amnesia

Wouldn't you if you need to forget the people who don't need ya?

I wish I could--I'd do anything for a memory pill

Overdose to forget those who didn't love you and never will

If the years of hurt made me stronger or not

I wish they never happened and I wish forgot 

All of them--all sixteen

Starting at 7, kids didn't really like me

I was the weird kid

The new one up north from down south

The one who always laughed and opened her mouth

To speak aloud, heads in the clouds, refused to come down

till a lunge full of water caught me off guard

and sank my heart

straight to the bottom

all those fucking years 

an innocent child in tears

'cuz some kids didn't like me

didn't like the way I looked 

or the way I was

I say was but i really mean is

nothing really changed other than now i'm pissed

I'm mad at myself, the world, my ex, all happy boys and girls,

like what the fuck did that innocent child

the one laughed at and bullied

the one that was me

ever do to ever lose to ever be anything but happy

 

 

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