There I was only nine years old

Learning what's right and what's wrong, but doing nothing that I am told

Had no clue that other than boys and toys there was more to life 

Seeing mommy with a boyfriend made me hope to one day become a wife

Too smart for my age I never played dumb

Didn't even hit puberty and still felt like the only one

"The only one who loves me is me" , I would say

Packed some clothes and my favorite toy in a bag and planned to run away

Mom took us to church every once in a blue moon

So I took a nap on the pew and told God "see you soon"

Had no idea what my savior had done for me while I slept

At age twelve I learned the greatest verse in the bible for me was "Jesus wept"

Wept for what I would ask

That's when I realized he wept that some day I'd take off this mask

That one day I'd stop calling myself a thug and a boss

Lay down all my desires and pick up my cross

Years passed and people told me but i still didn't know

"God told me what he could see, so why doesn't it show"

How come when I look in this mirror I can't see what God can

They say pray really hard so that God shows you his plan

Some plant, some water, but God makes it grow

Loving God in public, but doubting on the low

My God is merciful and loves me even when I'm wrong

Such an awesome God somebody wrote it in a song

Dealing with so many sins for so long

God hold me like a child because I can not be strong

And that's exactly what he plans to do

Feed you the word with a bottle like a babe until you see his love is true

The awesome love of a father that can come from no other

Love that He has given to every sister and brother

So I hope that this has shed some light on a clue that I find to be true

My awesome God loves me and he loves all of you