No

Sat, 08/09/2014 - 18:22 -- TGorum

Location

No.
Is all I hear.
Always something said and automatic.
Instant, final, precise, done.
Constant, yes. Beneficial, ehh. Helpful,
No. (However, it's a little neccessary)
Always on the tips of ones' tongues.
Thrown around like it's no big deal.
How many times this word has conquered, prevaled, and won.
But, does it matter?
No. (Well, not all the time, but sometimes)
To hiding in plain sight
which is what I often do.
I know people can see me
and I see them too but, do they truly see me?
No. (Ehh, their loss. I'm great!)
To giving advice and critiques, 
to expressing my thoughts, opinions, and voice.
Showing my likes, dislikes, and so-so's.
Does anyone truly care?
No. (But I'm so gad at it though)
Expressed constantly my talents, ambitions, goals, and dreams. 
Big enough, strong enough, loud enough, 
important enough? Clearly, apparently, obviously,
sorry, but, 
No. (But, at least I have them unlike most)
Taking the blame, the brunt, the accusations, 
the workload, and the responsibility.
Putting more into others than myself, and others before myself
is there trust, reliance, independence for me, from me, with me?
No. (But, at least I know what to do in certain situations)
Decisions on my future even when already planned.
Wiped clean, decided and further controlled.
Where do I go from here? 
Who? What? When? Where? Why? ... Help?
No. (Then, I'll figure something out on my own)
Being kept in one place for so long 
and many missed oppurtunities long gone.
Traveling, socializing, exploring, growing, 
living, perhaps?
No. (At least for now)
To being dismissed, ignored, irrelevant and unthought of
at least, until needed or work  needs to be done.
Or even just simply being remembered...
As I grow older, who am I? Am I relevant now?
No. (Well, sort of)
Hours of solitude
hiding behind emotions unseen, feelings unsaid, 
a body untouched, a heart unhealed, a spirit unattached.
Is anyone there? Is anyone listening.
No. (Except right now)

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