Past Pain

Location

68643
United States
41° 42' 30.9708" N, 97° 17' 12.7248" W

Snip.
Slice.
Hack.
Slash.
Stab.

Words
that describe something
I used to do

Cutting.
What people call it
What people demonize

Cutter.
What people called me
Who people pitied

Cuts.
What I can still see
What still bothers me

Cut.
What the act of it is
What I want to do

Cut.
Something I didn't do
for attention

Cuts.
Things I made
out of sheer anguish

Cutter.
Something I became
to channel my agony

Cutting.
Something I still fight
because I want to.

No
You probably don't understand.
Yes
You are probably judging me
No
It doesn't matter, but
Yes
It does affect me

Channeling pain
from my heart
to my
leg
arm
wrist
ankle
Numbs what I feel
Takes away that pain
for a little bit

I am ashamed
but I'm trying to
move on

But every time
something happens
I get stressed out
I feel hurt
I just want
to reach for that knife

Stab.
Slash.
Hack.
Slice.
Snip.

Scar.
Something that can't
be taken away

Scars.
Things that mar my body
that can be seen

Scarring.
This is what happened
after all the cuts

Scars.
Things I am ashamed of
that can't be hidden

Scar.
Something that sticks around
longer than all the hurt

Cut.
Scar.
Pain.
They work together
but not independently.

Not all cuts, scar
not all cuts, cause pain

But most of my pain
caused cuts

Most of my cuts
caused scars

And most of my scars
cause shame.

Comments

tay_bird95

This is amazing! 

-fellow cutter

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