Random Voice.

I am in a room full of people, bustling, busy as I sit in the back,

I look up from the dull dark gray desk, to my demise, and see you.

I looked down again and felt pierced as though by a tack,

I wish I had but some courage then I may try to talk, but this wouldn't happen I knew.

I am a coward, a sham, a weak one. 

I had looked on for years, and dreamt of only saying hi,

I thought, "My chances are done."

I never had them to begin with, how did you capture this heart that is mine?

I dont remember when it happened, or even how so,

I wish I knew so that I could think it through and learn to forget you,

I only know that once you had hold, you didn't let go.

I wish that I didn't feel this way. I admit, I love you, its true.

You will never hear these words, 

You wont even know who might have thought them.

You continue on your way, free as a bird,

You would in so, my true love condemn.

I want nothing from you, other than to be at your side

I want to make you happy, but alas, I only feel small when you are around.

I sit here in my own personal demise, as silence I abide,

I dont know which is better, should I continue loving, or should my love be drowned?

I wish it were so easily done,

I have tried to move on long ago.

I heard the bell pierce my thinking like a gun.

I saw you sit in the front and and sat in woe.

I needed to do something to get you out of my head,

I then thought of it, stupid, crazy, and painful to us both

I stood up slowly, my knees barely standing under my dread.

I needed to do this, I made myself a quick oath.

I raised my finger slowly as the class turned to see.

I was to far in now, all that was left was to do. 

You turned finally and looked straight at me.

I almost cried, but I held back my tears, "I hate you!"

I yelled it loud and with angry dripping from my tongue.

You looked destroyed by my blatant lie.

I was surronded by students, some furious angry among. 

You ran out of the room with tears in your eyes.

I did what I must, I can move on, and you won't have me to bother you.

You acted strange what did you care about what one random voice.

I couldn't have been important. Surely you didn't care, surely I didn't break through.

I am a room full of people, yet empty and void, and I wonder, "Did I make the right choice?"

I look down at my dull dark grey desk, and, to my demise, never see you again.

 

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