I finally had an excuse 

to message you today, 

i waited so long with my heart 

jumping out of my chest with 

each minute that passed. 

I checked even though I got no notifications 

because 

technology can be crazy sometimes, 

or at least that's what I told myself 

so an hour and exactly 15 minutes later 

i checked my messages again waiting 

for a reply 

and all I saw that made me 

sick to my stomach 

was that you read the message.