Regrets Healed Over

At one I slept soundly

 

Then at two, at three, at four

 

Five came the BIG MISTAKE

 

And my rest wasn't restful anymore

 

 

 

Social missteps quickly forgotten

 

Or so I preferred to believe

 

But at six, at seven, at eight

 

The memory from five wouldn't leave

 

 

 

Cruel words born of ignorance

 

Humiliation at five, six, seven

 

It couldn't be escaped

 

Burning less than than at eleven

 

 

 

And so it went year by year

 

Prickling my conscience here and there

 

Old and new regrets piling on

 

'Til I was nearly overcome by despair

 

 

 

How could anyone stand me?

 

The bile I used to spew

 

Before I saw it for what it was

 

Spitting vitriol like it was true

 

 

 

Wallowing in self pity 

 

Holing myself up in my room

 

Sealing my mouth to prevent new regrets

 

My surroundings smothered by gloom

 

 

 

I was blessed

 

I was not alone

 

I was dragged out of isolation

 

And given a chance to atone

 

 

 

Therapy once a week

 

Medication to keep irrationality at bay

 

The missteps and memories kept coming

 

But I could see it was okay

 

 

 

The regrets didn't chafe anymore

 

They were sad, but that's all

 

I couldn't undo them

 

But they didn't have me chained to a wall

 

 

 

My childhood mistakes can't be undone

 

But adult me won't repeat a single one

This poem is about: 
Me
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