Rewind

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  Telling the untold story of my childhoodRewinding the despicable memories that withdraws me from fully happinessTo me when I was a little girlpeace meant warand joy meant agony, because it came with sacrifices Rewind.......... Back to the time when I would sell cassava leavesand pounded maize just to help my familyI wondered where I’d get money to buy medicinefor my beloved mother and late brother as they were diagnosed with tuberculosis Rewind........... Back to the time when my dreams were filled with nothingbut dust and less hopeWhen I’d just sit on porch with bricks unpainted and crackedjust waiting for our landlord to kick my family out of a one roomed shelterIt’s all gone now, but engraved in my heart Rewind.......... To the time when my sick yet strong mother kept telling me to put a smileon my face, because all these sufferings aren’t meant for us“Smile dear, smile. Fill the whole house with laughters.” she’d sayAnd all I could think of is how to raise on my feet and scream“Mother, mother stop. we can’t shut out anguish, it’s with usmother, stop pretending that it is all well.”The struggle was there, I just wanted to scream, shout, and spit wordsthat’ll make your blood boil like lava, but then my voice was sucked in by that anguishYou could hear my mother’s heart acheYou could hear it’s theme songAs it sings praises like we were it’s appraisal Rewind.......... Back to the time when I thought that the heaven has caged in all their blessingwhere I thought that the Lord has forsaken his own, I began to deny my salvationback to the time when instead of tears of joy, like when a barren woman gives birth falling down my face, tears of pain did How I wish I could save all those tears that flowed like riversso that my distress can drown in them in slow motionLife isn’t perfect, it’s like an endless movie all about bittersweetand a little fast to the sweet part could’ve saved lives. Rewind.......... It’s all gone now. I can’t remember a single thing.      

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