Sexuality Limbo

 

Love. Quite silly isn't it? 
You can't help who you love yet find yourself attracted to her.. oh how sinful. I bet God is staring down laughing at how you turned out. A girl raised with wonderful intentions destined to marry a man,have a child make her father and mother proud.  Everyone said, "She'll meet a great man who will treat her like a queen." Why can't I be treated that way by another queen?  Why must I push aside my feelings to be someone I'm not and never was. So, I love her, I can love guys too. But wait, no you can't. You have to choose become a "true"  outcast love girls only... or be a member of the straight community. I find myself an ostracized member of a new group,one never seen,nor acknowledged the ghosts who lie in between world's invisible no matter where they go. I find myself not being,  "gay" enough yet never really straight. I find my peers those who love all like pansexuals or have no sexual attraction at all like asexuals, to be more welcoming. I find that being in between means not existing. So I'm a myth a fairy tale like a unicorn or a girl with a red hood who falls into the clutches of a hungry wolf... I'm but a story of something that could never be true.  I find myself dating a girl,an amazing one at that she's gorgeous,sweet,caring,I swear she's perfect in my eyes. Yet... do I change who I am to be with her. I mean I must be gay when I'm with a girl and straight when I'm with a guy. Oh my,where did you hear this ignorant lie?!  My sexuality does not change no matter who I'm with, I'm me regardless.  So when looking for the girl whose heart yearns for love regardless what gender they are, you'll find me in between worlds teetering in limbo.

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