Suicide and You

This is a response poem to something I heard one of my 'friends' say - "People who want to commit suicide are stupid and selfish. If they want to die, I say let them. They can have fun in Hell." 
 
You ignorant son of a bitch
Let me rip out your heart 
Scrape every last piece of who you think you are away 
Until there's nothing left
Let me tell you of all the ways you are a burden 
A disappointment
 
Let me whisper in your ear all of your shortcomings
An ever-growing list might i add
Let me become the thoughts that torture you
The fears that keep you up at night 
 
Let me break every bone in your body
So you might recognize what pain truly is 
 
Then multiply that 
 
For emotional pain is much worse
Emotional pain radiates through you
Confines you within your own head
It doesnt disapear with drugs 
Or by being put in a splint for a week 
Then it heals and goes back to normal 
 
No
Let me re-break your bones when it seems they are just starting to heal
Let me see you need help then leave the cripple to walk alone
Let me tie weights to your feet and throw you in the deepest ocean trench I can find
Let me watch you while you drown 
Let me show you
What it is 
To be suicidal 
 
Tell me
Do you know what it is like to hate yourself?
I do
 
Tell me 
Does thinking three hours into the future terrify you because you are constantly praying prayers of rescue that if there is in fact a God that cares he will hear your pleas and send his dark angel of mercy to come for you so you don't have to face tomorrow
 
Tell me
When youre screaming for help
And no one can hear you
Tell me 
Will you still be so proud?
So sure?
When all you can hear are your own words besting in your chest
Worthless
Stupid 
Selfish 
Tell me
Would you still claim that you would not
Even for a second 
Think of taking your own life?
 
Tell me
When you see a scarf do you think:
A: Yea, this will go with all of my outfits
Or 
B: I could make this go with my outfit 
 
Tell me
Does everything in your sight
Become a potential tool
Of your own destruction
 
My answer? 
It used to 
 
Tell me
When you tire of waisting what little energy you have to convince other people that you are fine when you are anything but fine so you let down your facade 
Only to find that the people you thought were your friends 
Were wearing a mask of their own
Will you be surprised?
 
And when the night comes 
When you feel you are out of options
When your brain is not even fully functioning because you have been so depressed for so long that chemicals are missing 
Tell me
When you genuinely believe you are 
Hated
Worthless
Stupid
When all of your thoughts dwell upon the heartache you have cause your family so you think theyd be better off 
Happier
Healthier 
Without you
Would you still call your thinking selfish?
 
I dont think so
 
Dear pompous ass
While i now know that suicide is never the answer
I did not always see the overly-cliched light at the end of the tunnel
However
The difference between you and i 
Is that i have experienced what it is to be depressed and suicidal
You have not
Therefore
When it comes to topics you have neither experience with nor sympathy towards
I invite you to keep your opinions to yourself and your mouth shut 
 
Because hurting people near you just to prove your point
Thats selfish
And passing judgment when you have no right
Thats stupid
 
So you see my dear friend
Suicide is not stupid and selfish
You are 
 
 
This poem is about: 
Me
My family
My community
My country
Our world

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