Ten Thoughts On Loving a Transgender Boy

Location

Brandon, SD
United States

Ten Thoughts on Loving a Transgender Boy

 

One:

His hands are soft.

Softness like that after years of

Dishwashing and viola lessons

Feels like a miracle.

 

Two:

His smile is crooked

And sincere and nervous

Like a stray kitten that he lets me

Coax closer to the cup of my palms.

His smile is shy,

His smile is shy,

His smile is tentative

And retractable at the slightest sign

Of danger.

 

Three:

He is always in danger

From all angles and I am terrified

And I am angry

That some people would rather see him

Dead than married

Dead than happy

Dead for who he is

 

Four:

Who he is is not confusion

Who he is is not a question

Who he is is who he is

And who is he is beautiful

 

Five:

He is beautiful. He hates when

I say so, but I don’t mean beautiful

As opposed to handsome I mean

Beautiful as in wonderful

Like watching a flower bloom in slow motion

Like listening to the sound of a snare drum

Rolling down a hill and smashing into my heart

Like watching the tiny quivering of a caterpillar

Inside its temporary armor

Every time he pushes back his hair.

 

Six:

His hair may sometimes be pink.

His anxieties may sometimes be weird, but

His pronouns are he, him, his, and Sir

and

His pronouns are male.

 

Seven:

He is male.

 

Eight:

“She” and “it” are words that belong to me

And he deserves more justice than the

Meager little he has

But is too polite to claim.

He is too polite to correct you but I am not

Too polite to correct you

 

Nine:

I call him Boy.

 

Ten:

I call him Boy and I will fight

Tooth and nail

To defend a male

Who is treated like a second-class citizen

 

Ten:

He is not a second class citizen

 

Ten:

He is not a second- class citizen.

 

Nine:

I want to protect him.

 

Eight:

I cannot protect him.

 

Seven:

I wish I could protect him.

 

Six:

He doesn’t need anyone to protect him.

 

Five:

Nobody can protect him.

 

Four:

People want to harm him.

 

Three:

Why would someone want to harm him?

 

Two:

Please, god, don’t let them harm him.

 

One:

If you cut open a chrysalis before the

Butterfly emerges,

Only liquid comes out.

Beneath that shell the caterpillar has already taken itself apart

And is panicking to put itself together before

Someone takes it apart

Before it presents to you its colors

That will be so beautiful

Please,

God,

Let them see that he is beautiful.

 

Ten Thoughts on Loving a Transgender Boy

 

One:

His hands are soft.

Softness like that after years of

Dishwashing and viola lessons

Feels like a miracle.

 

Two:

His smile is crooked

And sincere and nervous

Like a stray kitten that he lets me

Coax closer to the cup of my palms.

His smile is shy,

His smile is shy,

His smile is tentative

And retractable at the slightest sign

Of danger.

 

Three:

He is always in danger

From all angles and I am terrified

And I am angry

That some people would rather see him

Dead than married

Dead than happy

Dead for who he is

 

Four:

Who he is is not confusion

Who he is is not a question

Who he is is who he is

And who is he is beautiful

 

Five:

He is beautiful. He hates when

I say so, but I don’t mean beautiful

As opposed to handsome I mean

Beautiful as in wonderful

Like watching a flower bloom in slow motion

Like listening to the sound of a snare drum

Rolling down a hill and smashing into my heart

Like watching the tiny quivering of a caterpillar

Inside its temporary armor

Every time he pushes back his hair.

 

Six:

His hair may sometimes be pink.

His anxieties may sometimes be weird, but

His pronouns are he, him, his, and Sir

and

His pronouns are male.

 

Seven:

He is male.

 

Eight:

“She” and “it” are words that belong to me

And he deserves more justice than the

Meager little he has

But is too polite to claim.

He is too polite to correct you but I am not

Too polite to correct you

 

Nine:

I call him Boy.

 

Ten:

I call him Boy and I will fight

Tooth and nail

To defend a male

Who is treated like a second-class citizen

 

Ten:

He is not a second class citizen

 

Ten:

He is not a second- class citizen.

 

Nine:

I want to protect him.

 

Eight:

I cannot protect him.

 

Seven:

I wish I could protect him.

 

Six:

He doesn’t need anyone to protect him.

 

Five:

Nobody can protect him.

 

Four:

People want to harm him.

 

Three:

Why would someone want to harm him?

 

Two:

Please, god, don’t let them harm him.

 

One:

If you cut open a chrysalis before the

Butterfly emerges,

Only liquid comes out.

Beneath that shell the caterpillar has already taken itself apart

And is panicking to put itself together before

Someone takes it apart

Before it presents to you its colors

That will be so beautiful

Please,

God,

Let them see that he is beautiful.

 

 

 

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