Too Much Melanin For Depression

I have a knife. A big one. I keep it with me at all times. My brother gave it to me for protection but I hide behind it like a shield because weakness. Is not. An option. I'm too dark to be depressed. Too blessed to be stressed but can I stress that some funks are just too deep for me to climb out of. I hold back tears to avoid drowning in a lake of "yeah I'm fine" and "I'm just tired". I am a warrior. Scars clear as the sun that I've tried to let brighten my dark days and my eyes so that my fascade would be more believable. I hope you can get with this because I don't know any other way to put it. My melanin exceeds the limit to call this depression so I guess it's just a permanent bad attitude. My kind don't self harm so I guess I just wanted attention. The only episodes we know are on TV so I must be an actress to have one of those. Isn't it fun to have your screams turned into something else? To be so white washed even your depression gets a new name?

This poem is about: 
Me

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