i convince myself of awful things. i deserve this. i deserve to be miserable. happiness isn’t for me.

you may convince yourself of awful things but that doesn’t mean they’re true. everyone deserves a chance at happiness. happiness is for everyone. it’s just harder to achieve for certain people.

 

depression is confusing. i want to be held and to have someone tell me everything will be okay. but at the same time i want to be alone and cry.

yes depression is confusing, but that doesn’t mean you can’t overcome it. you have to be determined to get better and never give up no matter how tough things get.

 

i’m obsessed with the idea of dying. not actually physically dying. i just like the idea of not having to worry about anything. i like the idea of being in some afterlife not having the struggles of a job, school, or relationships

dying will not solve all your problems. worrying about others isn’t a bad thing. the struggle is finding a balance between worrying about others and worrying about yourself.

 

it’s exhausting constantly trying to overcome things. because as soon as you feel things are going well. life turns on you and something awful happens. a friend leaves. a loved one suffers. you relapse.

yes recovery is hard. and it may feel like things always go wrong. but struggles only make you that much stronger.

 

my mind is slowly closing and i feel so alone. it’s a weird feeling. feeling so alone even when surrounded by people who care. it’s a hard feeling to explain because you’re so caught in your head.

isolation will not help you. you may feel alone right now. but you have many people who care about you. and they wouldn’t be here if they didn’t care.

 

stop overthinking=you’re being irrational

stop overthinking=these thoughts are irrational you need to take a step back and reevaluate

 

why didn’t you ask sooner=you wasted my time

why didn’t you ask sooner=you can speak up and i will try to help

 

hair everywhere. i dont know what to do. my hair is everywhere. it’s on the floor covering the area around me. a circle of hair surrounds me. its like i'm trapped in my own body. but at the same time i'm being triggered to pull by my own body. i'm damaging my exterior.

trichotillomania. hair will always be a trigger. the impulse to pull all my hair out will always be there. my exterior will struggle by revealing bald patches. but bald is beautiful.

 

it sucks knowing someone you care about so much is starting to leave. knowing they’re giving up on you. i try so hard to fix things. i try so hard to please everyone. but it’s not that easy. i put myself in all these situations and i don’t know how to stop. i brought all these things upon myself. i try to make good decisions and they always turn around and haunt me.

people come in and out of your life for a reason. pleasing everyone is not your responsibility. you are only responsible for your own happiness. situations come and go. decisions will only come back to haunt if you aren’t confident in the decision.

 

when is the right time to say no? when do i draw the line?

say no when the situation is putting you in danger. draw the line when you feel uncomfortable.