To know what my future holds,
You must understand my past.
It's too much to swallow or
To sip from a glass.
It weighs a ton,
Therefore it makes you exhausted after I'm done.
It's too much for you to bear.
Too much pain for me to spare.
I wouldn’t dare to scratch the surface of my past.
It's a perpetual memory that will always last.
The gaps that my past holds in its hands
Sinks you like a mound of quick-sand.
Can you imagine being deprived of your innocence,
While your mother is sitting there and enjoying the violence?
I know it sounds ridiculous.
But that's just reality.
It was a tragic moment that changed my personality.
They say everyone will go through ups and downs in life.
I can only speak about the "downs".
I don’t have any recollections of the "ups" in my life.
I only have the memories of me being jabbed with a knife.
Slicing and slashing through my bare skin.
Beating on me as if I wasn’t some kin.
My engine yearns for genuine oil.
Oil, that wouldn’t leave me in turmoil.
No one can help me with this burden.
Every time I speak about it, I start hurting.
I guess I have to settle with the past,
Engage in the present and
Believe in the future because
No one knows what my future holds,
Until my past is unfold.