The Unsaid Offering of Silent Gratitude
You created who I am today, who I strive to be
You gave me life
You loved me
You put a shelter over me head
You gave me a bed to sleep in
You put food on the dinner table for us
But when you hear cries do you come to help?
No
You tell me that crying is for the weak
When I mess up, do you you help me correct it?
No
You scream at me for being so stupid
When I try my best, and it doesn’t meet expectations, do you promise me the future?
No
You throw me outside so I can pay for not reaching your expectations
When I act out from the pain, do you ask or try to understand?
No
You threaten until I have learned my lesson
When I ask for help, what do you do?
NOTHING
Nothing
You claim the title of being supportive
Yet when I turn for you, I am only greeted with with slap across the face and anger
You had tried to craft me into your perfect mold of this imaginary daughter
To be submissive
To only listen and obey
To follow every command given
I will no longer obey
And I will continue this path until I see my way through
You believe you gave me everything
But what I needed most you looked past
I believe that you would be my savior
I looked up to you believing that you would come and help
I believed in you
Over and over again
I put my trust back into you
And yet all I get in return is pain
Pain
It covers the walls
The black and gray tones splattered across with red angry claw marks
Help me
Someone help me
I looked for you
I believed in you
I wished for you
But you were never there
And pain
Oh the pain
Pain is all I know
And it is now my best friend
But this pain
This pain resulted in the answer I’ve been needing
It gave me the power to continue in life
It gave me the power to remove myself from you so I can believe in myself for once
And this pain will be something I forever carry on with me
I have grown resilient to you
To the pain
I have grown stronger than you have ever expected
Because of what you have done
I have grown
When years comes and decades past
When it is my time to shelter, love, and comfort a child of my own
Know that thanks so you
I will never be like you
I will love my child as she were
I will be there when she needs me
I may not be able to offer her the world
But I will offer her my love