An Untold Future

These fears swarm me

Causing me anxiety

I cannot fight them

But oh, how I want to be special

I want to grow!

But something restricts me

Furthermore into my sorrow

 

What is it?

I need a change

But I cannot find the strength to fight for it

I need a dream

But my eyes lay wake

Dead in the cold winter nights. 

Hoping to find a new light 

 

Down I go

Sinking farther into my fears and anxiety for my future

 

Will I ever forgive him?

Will I ever be successful in the way I see myself to be?

How can I change the way I act without losing myself?

Will I ever be special...

 

This new and unlivable chapter leads my soul to a stale place

Not moving

Not trying

Though I say to the ones that try to care 

"I'm fine. I'm just chillin"

While in reality I am crying

My fear of the future is eating me from the inside

Tearing each limb piece by piece

Saving no part for a glorious return

 

need a change

But gosh darn it! How do I do it?!

 

Deep down inside

I know what I have to do..

I musn't think as though I am living in the future

I cannot force myself to be like any other

I cannot fear for my success if I am ever to be special in my own eyes

 

My life is not in the future

It is in the present

I can't worry about these fears for the future

The ones I cannot control

I have to relinquish my paranoid thoughts 

And live as if I am alive

 

Wait

What is.. 

What is this I feel?

Am I..

Hmm

I am

 

I am... breathing

 

For what seems like ages

My fear is gone

Completly gone

It is gone!

 

But I am not

I am still here

And living without fear 

 

My life is in the present

 

It has truly begun

This poem is about: 
Me
Poetry Terms Demonstrated: 

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