My mama ain't here,
My pa was never there.
Never had a real mom,
Went from working to a drinking bomb.
Never had a real dad,
Yeah I guess it makes me a little sad.
She told me 1 & 2 beat her,
The third one I had to hear.
Thoughts of going suicide,
Will they finally stop putting me to the side?
Or will they focus on me for just a minute,
Then go back to forgettin?
Probably will forget me,
'Cause I was never really anything pretty to see.
So maybe I should go for it,
Or maybe just see myself bleed for a bit.
Oh yeah that already happened,
'Cause when I was doing something good no one was clappin'.
Why don't I get the applause?
Is it because I'm not the boss?
Who am I living for?
'Cause all my life is a bore.
I got all these damn problems,
Can't someone just rob 'em?
I'm tired of being poor,
I swear everyday is a war.
Paying for my own shit since age 11,
Does believing in God through all this mean I'm going to heaven?
My best friend said he swore I was an angel,
I almost cried because my life is such a tangle.
Try not to get too close to people we call friends,
They usually walk out and have early ends.
Can't wait to get out of this crazy house,
I feel smaller than a mouse.
They tried to say I was the crazy one,
Mama tried to put me into a mental institution.
Am I really crazy? You tell me,
Half the time I feel like a confused baby.
Damn this shit making me wanna cry,
Like my mama in the background, all I can do is sigh.
I can't save her from this one,
I wish I could blow my head off with a gun.
Wait that's abnormal thinking,
Am I on drugs? Take a test of my tinkling.