What Was Going On

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I wake just to hear
my parents argue back and forth in fear.
I didn't know what was going on.
 
As I listen, they yell at my sister...
every denial from her made my dad angrier.
I didn't know what was going on.
 
Back and forth, words were bad...
bad enough to make my mother sad.
I didn't know what was going on.
 
I've never heard my father so furious.
The argument is what makes me curious.
I didn't know what was going on.
 
While I think hard, my sister lost guard.
She shouted out a sentence that broke my heart.
I suddenly knew what was going on.
 
There was complete silence for a second.
What she says, stays in my head.
I suddenly knew what was going on.
 
Then, I feel something drip down.
I see blood getting to the ground.
I'm finding out what was going on.
 
It was from the middle of everything.
The private area kept bleeding.
I'm finding out what was going on.
 
Speechless without a thought,
I punch into my walls with all I've got.
I'm remembering what was going on.
 
Flashbacks smash right in front of my eyes...
All I wanted was to die.
I'm now watching what was going on.
 
He jams it into my mouth...
I couldn't breathe to shout...
I'm dreading what was going on.
 
I soon taste something exploding.
Tears begin to fall... I'm understanding.
I remember what was going on.
 
I felt my heart stop a beat.
My body numbs along my feet.
I hated what was going on.
 
The day after, I had church at noon.
I needed to sing to Jesus soon...
after all, He knew what was going on.
 
I walked outside to cry.
I am begging to die.
I can't stand what was going on.
 
My mother knew where I could be.
It took her another half hour to believe
what was going on.
 
A week after, things got worse.
One message pointed out that I was suffering a curse...
after going through what was going on.
 
"We should no longer be friends."
God, please let this end.
I don't want to remember what was going on.
 
I drop my phone to the ground.
Hatred and anger is what I've found.
I'm starting to love what was going on.
 
I got into a rebellious personality,
after losing my virginity.
I loved what was going on.
 
Vomiting was one thing...
cutting was another that I was good at besides not eating.
Life got better with what was going on.
 
All night, I stare at my mirror...
only to see somebody in fear.
I'm questioning what was going on.
 
People around identify me
as a bitch, prostitute, and a nobody.
I'm starting to notice what was going on.
 
An old friend awakens me.
As she’s finding out the deep scar I wore underneath,
she soon realized what was going on.
 
Today, I'm starting to be relaxed, and well prepared.
I want to find myself and be repaired.
I will accept what was going on.
 
There are times when I go back to the past.
But I know the memories won't last.
I'm moving on from what was going on.
 
 

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